Two Worlds

A return to Ischia, at first, was a return to tranquility. © Photo by Francesca Di Meglio

Get the truth about one of Italy’s most popular islands – and its people – by reading my new weekly blog installments (every Monday right here on this site)

Chapter Twenty-Eight – Return to the Homeland

After I arrived in Italy for the first time since I began dating Tony, he greeted me at the airport, and we took a drive from Naples to Florence, where I was going to meet some Italian editors with whom I had worked. Once in the car, Tony asked if he could kiss me, something we had not done in the months since he was in the United States. When I agreed, he gave me a movie-like kiss and we left. With a smile on his face, Tony asked me about our trip and we talked for hours, occasionally holding hands while he drove, before I started to fall asleep.

When I awoke, we were almost in Florence. Traffic was keeping us from arriving, so I gave Tony a gift I had brought for him. It was a link bracelet made of titanium. He was thrilled, and gifted me with another one of those kisses. This time we both had a big smile on our faces. Unfortunately, however, it was short lived. Those first couple of days in Florence were difficult. I spent most of the time working with my editors while Tony did some site seeing on his own. On our way back to Naples (to catch a boat to the island of Ischia, home of my ancestors and Tony), we committed to spending more time together. I had taken vacation for the rest of my two weeks in Italy.

After finally arriving at Tony’s house, I was a bit overwhelmed by his family. I too have a big Italian family, but I never actually lived with my siblings, their spouses, and their children. After you wed, you left and lived in your own home. Although I had spent much of my childhood with my first cousins – who my mother often cared for because she worked for my father from home – they all returned home to their parent’s homes in the evenings for dinner and sleep. During the school year, we were scattered at different schools in our town.

Tony’s family, on the other hand, lived all together in one big house that had once served as my father’s middle school – yes, it’s a small world – and then Tony’s family’s hotel. While each of his sisters and their families had their own apartments upstairs, everyone spent most of their time downstairs with Tony and his mom. All 13 people living in the house ate breakfast, lunch, and dinner together. All the children went to school in the same place. Still, I was enamored with their open arms. They seemed as welcoming as my family. And Tony’s three nieces, who ranged in age from 4 to 7 were adorable; they took to me right away. I thought, “I could fit into this family.” They seemed so much like my own. They ate, they shared, and they loved.

Some names and identifying characteristics of the real people involved have been changed.

Tune into this Web site, Two Worlds, every Monday for the latest installment in my blog about my experiences in Ischia, and every other Monday to ItaliansRus.com for the latest Our Paesani column about all things Italian. Di Meglio is also the Guide to Newlyweds for About.com.

Ischia and Antonio called me back in 2005. © Photo by Antonio Gerenini

Get the truth about one of Italy’s most popular islands – and its people – by reading my new weekly blog installments (every Monday right here on this site)

Chapter Twenty-Seven – Talking All Night

For months, Tony and I used our webcam to keep up the romance we began when he visited me in the United States. During the winter months, when Tony was not working, we would spend every evening talking into the wee hours of the morning. It was kind of nice because there was no pressure on us to come up with unforgettable date nights or to develop physical intimacy. We couldn’t even kiss, so we really spent our nights just talking. Sometimes, Tony and I would set aside time just to ask each other questions designed to learn surprising things about one another. This went on for months, and I have to admit despite being separated by an ocean and seeing each other only through these machines, we seemed to be getting closer and closer to one another.

I learned about Tony’s family – three older sisters, three brothers-in-law, a nephew, and three nieces, a late father and a mother, who was still mourning seven years later. He learned about my days at university in Washington, D.C. We talked about how we’d like our futures to look and what our past taught us. My Italian improved ten-fold even though I was already fluent. Although Tony was a reluctant student of English, every once in a while he’d pick up on one of our words and slip it into conversation. We spoke to each other – one way or another – every single day, sometimes more than once.

When April rolled around and the sun began to shine again in Ischia, Tony had to return to work. Still, he would stop by the computer to chat with me. If he couldn’t, he’d send me a romantic text message. This was not enough for him, so he asked me if my leg was strong enough now for a trip to visit him in Italy. I agreed to visit right after Easter, and I stayed at his house for two weeks. It was enlightening and delightful and more than I could have ever expected.

Some names and identifying characteristics of the real people involved have been changed.

Tune into this Web site, Two Worlds, every Monday for the latest installment in my blog about my experiences in Ischia, and every other Monday to ItaliansRus.com for the latest Our Paesani column about all things Italian. Di Meglio is also the Guide to Newlyweds for About.com.